wow i either have 0 feelings or all feelings at once
zarry: people who always change their opinions to match with someone elses
turnc0at: turnc0at: turnc0at: turnc0at: GUESS WHO GOT SOME APPLE FLAVOURED SHAMPOO WAIT NO I MEANT SCENTED DON’T WORRY IT TASTES LIKE APPLES TOO i just threw up
uoa: never give up on your dreams keep sleeping
theblindvisionary: we take the naps we think we deserve
bedquest: I AM GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH WITH MY OWn mouth softly because i like you
louisharrystylinson: thehemospectrum: what if our fingers were only as long as our toes
anotherbeetle: psilentasincjelli: If I ever tell you I’m going to sleep and then you see me posting or liking things online for about an hour immediately after that, I promise I wasn’t lying to you, I’m just bad at going to sleep and it is usually a long process that begins with disengaging from any sort of immediate contact with people (chats, for example) and ends when everything on my...
bakedzitis: being famous must be so hard they probably have to shave their legs like everyday
repeating-serenity: my little brother wrote about me for school and this was one of the sentences he wrote. im sobbing “my sister is my role model because she can watch 12 years worth of law and order in 3 months”
side effects of being friends with me include gaining extensive knowledge of tv shows you dont watch or care about
jesuschristvevo: i want to blow up my school but i dont want to get in trouble u feel me
nyozeka: i hope my first child is a dragon
nickiminiall: isn’t it weird that we pay money to see other human beings?
harrysthefather: harrysthefather: SO I WAS AT STARBUCKS RIGHT AND I SAW THIS OLD MAN SITTING ALONE AND DRINKING HIS LITTLE CUP OF COFFEE ALL CUTELYI WAS LIKE AWW SO I WROTE THIS AND GAVE IT TO HIM HE WAS SO HAPPY I WANTED TO CRY OHM YGOD OHMGDFKSJAH HE JUST FCKGNS BOUGHT ME CHOCOLATE MILK AND PUT A PENNY AOF ON IT I CNSDKFA FUCK IM OGING TO CRY IN STARBUCKS HE BOUGHT ME CHOCOLATE...
What I actually say: I find serial killers interesting.
What other people hear: I am a serial killer.
helioscentrifuge: helioscentrifuge: guys i went into my kitchen and i kept hearing my cat but i couldn’t find her and she sounded really upset okay i found her and seriously what the hell cat hOW THEHELL DID YOU EVEN GET IN THERE
internetfeet: People mistake ovulation and menstruation to be the same thing when in fact they aren’t Ovulation is when the eggs are saying “hello friends I am here” And menstuation is when the eggs are saying “goodbye friends I am gone”
ennjey: WHY DO CATS AND DOGS LOSE ALL COORDINATION WHEN YOU PUT SOMETHING ON THEIR FEET
yunoeatyourbroccoli: theguiltydufresne: nabeleon: “i’m gonna draw” i whisper as i don’t “I’m gonna write” I whisper as I don’t. “I’m gonna get a life” I whisper as I don’t
amoying: penguinize: amoying: penguinize: 16 billion dollars can buy you 1,600,000,000 pizzas WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING $1 PIZZAS THO THEY WOULD BE 10 DOLLAR PIZZAS stay in school kids…
biologytextbook: *presses clear button on calculator 12 times*
Let them miss you. Sometimes when you’re always available, they take you for...– Anonymous (via c-oquetry)
Sometimes I miss you the way someone drowning remembers the air.– Tim Seibles, “Slow Dance” (via larmoyante)
egberts: viarga: just-laff: egberts: if i ever met a genie i wouldnt wish for a million dollars id wish that whenever i bought something i’d always have the right amount of money to pay for it in my pocket you are one of the great thinkers of our time Then you’d look at a house and be like “oh damn I wanna live there” and millions of dollars would be in your pockets, crushing and...
Art is to console those who are broken by life.– Vincent Van Gogh (via conor-broberst)
You unfollow me because you’re afraid of falling in love with me, I know
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN IT'S ALMOST JUNE I'M...
vvierd: vvierd: do you ever look in a mirror and think why.… am i so perfect
at least when you are hanging out with yourself, you get to pick the music